Its been almost 5 months since I've left the beautiful country of Uganda, since I've left 12 beautiful orphaned faces, and thousands of people who struggle every day for the simple provisions of life that I have been blessed with in my life here in America. A loving family, a home, an abundance of food and clean water, supportive and loving friends, a warm shower, a free education, an ability to praise my God freely, furnishings and clothing. I am truly blessed.
This past week I was reminded of the joy to feel a warm, pressurized shower, one that I didn't have for 3 months in Uganda, albeit, they did try to provide one. And then this afternoon in the warmth of the sun I stood in awe of the beauty of God's creation, in the budding hope of spring flowers and musical birds. I am truly blessed.
I've considered writing more in my blog from time to time, will anyone read it? Does it matter if anyone does? No. So I write just the same to remind myself of my blessings and to contemplate again why God called me to Africa, and to be reminded of my purpose.
Last night as I spoke with a friend I was once again so astounded by the ease of my life and how that is a blessing. I haven't struggled the way so many others do, from abusive relationships to struggles of addiction, from depression to loneliness. It's not that their haven't been any struggles, it's that there have been so many moments that mask those struggles that I can easily forget, or forgive. It is easy for me not to dwell on the difficult moments because I can see the beauty of the world and want to quench it's peoples' needs.
I have been contemplating all this in search of my Chazown, the Hebrew word for God's vision for my life. I wonder how did my journey to Africa support this vision? As I've stated before I am a bulldozer when it comes to tasks and getting things done, but God has made me compassionate for people, and so I make sure not to bulldoze people, or at least try my hardest not to. Everyone has their story and their story matters, and everyone wants their story to be heard. As I contemplate the potential of transforming a ministry I lead into a non-profit and potentially a CDC (perhaps my Chazown), I know that Africa helped me realize the tenderness of people, the sensitivity of people's hearts and the need to help others find their path, even if it's only serving a hot meal, or listening to them share their story.
In Proverbs 16:9 it says "In their hearts humans plan their course, but the Lord establishes their steps.". Between heeding the call to Africa and the months since I've returned I've been challenged through great sermons and good book selections to embrace God's vision for my life and to move ahead with faith and courage. Love Faith Build, Laura Faith Beverley, is ready to embrace the next step.
