Someone's story

I included this in my blog writing last night, but decided to revise it, so after this, check below:

We didn't have 'adult' devotions tonight since our evening was a bit jumbled up, but one of the guys asked to talk to me alone and asked for me to pray with him. He was struggling not only with his destiny but also some more immediate emotional needs. Now, I wouldn't share this story if that were it, but several days ago, after being quite fed-up with this person's work ethic I went to the Director to discuss my concerns. Me and this person had already been struggling with communiction, or lack thereof. Over the past several days this person has gone from having a visible downcasted nature to an involved, happy and hard-working person (what he was when I first arrives). So while I was making my sauce and he walked by I said, " I don't know what's happened to you the past few days but I like you." I know what happened, he got talked to and stepped up his game, but rather than say that I opted to acknowledge this change with some positive reinforcement. And I guess he was moved by what I said and decided he wanted to talk through some things. I could step back and think, maybe I was too hard on him in my criticism to the Director (criticism which I presented in a very rational, Biblical way), or I could be thankful for the opportunity to challenge him and that he felt I could be his confidante and pray with him; of course I like the latter best, I'm a compassionate bulldozer most of the time. And that was the end of my night, well except for writing this and doing my typical evening routine of some ab work and dancing. Goodnight! 11.10.12

So the reason for revisiting the above was because of our sermon this morning. It was a telecast from Watoto Central (we go to Watoto North) where John & Helen Burns, two Canadians, preached about Your Life as a Story (to hear the sermon, a good one, download it http://www.watotochurch.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=37&Itemid=86). The sermon was based on Matthew 13, where Jesus explains why he teaches using parables (which are stories meant to teach you lessons). Some of the highlights that I wrote down were:

-share the good and bad parts of your story, you never know how you can reach someone or relate to them with your inability to get it all right

-don't communicate to be right all the time, communicate to share and understand the stories being told

-seek to find identity and value from the bigger picture story (it's not all about you)

-we learn more from the brokenness than all the successes, consider all the struggles in the Bible

-leave an inheritance for future generations, not a financial inheritance but an opportunity to serve as an example

-don't take common things in your story for granted; be attentive

So after and during the sermon I thought more about what I wrote last night. Even last night as I wrote it I thought of some of what my dad has written in his Dig recently (check out www.findwisdomnow.com) about hearing each other's stories to have more compassion for one another. Should I have tried to sit with this guy first. I had attempted to teach through devotions some of the things I was struggling with regarding his behavior, and I prayed and contemplated speaking with the director for several days before actually doing so (wow, is that me having some patience?!). Last night he revealed some of his struggles, including that he rides his bike for 1-1 1/2 hours each way to get to and from school 3 days a week, that's exhausting in and of itself!

The things I complained about were greater than he isn't doing his job, they were more could this be detrimental to the ministry. And if he has turned around that quickly, maybe he just needed to be told what image he was creating, but when he told me he felt like so many people hate him, my heart hurt. I wish we could have had last night's conversation before I went to the Director, but since it's always 20/20 hindsight, I can only consider the other person's story next time before I rush to make my judgements and accusations.